GUIDELINES IN SELECTING A HUSBAND OR A WIFE

The woman was formed from the body of a man to be his helper and therefore she is called upon to yield her will to perform the role as responder. Marriage is a lifelong intimacy of a right man to a right woman in spirit, soul and body. Falling in love is not sufficient indication that the right partner is found for God's point of view. That is why confirmation must come from the Lord. There must be a wide knowledge or background from the Bible regarding marriage which is a deep friendship between a man and woman.
There are three parts of being: dating, engagement and marriage. Dating is a time to cultivate spiritual intimacy not for physical contact level. Engagement is a time for cultivating soul intimacy learning how each one conform with the others mind, emotions and will. Marriage is a time to develop body intimacy.

Genesis 2:24
That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united with his wife, and they become one.

GUIDELINES

1. Do not marry a nonbeliever

II Corinthians 6:14-16

Do not try to work together as equals with unbelievers, for it cannot be done. How can right and wrong be partners? How can light and darkness live together? How can Christ and the Devil agree? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? How can God's temple come to terms with pagan idols? For we are the temple of the living God! As God himself has said,
"I will make my home with my people and live among them; I will be their God, and they shall be my people."

This explains that two different species, in animals cannot unite to form an offspring. There is no such thing as dating Evangelism so it does not mean that a Christian is meant for another Christian. There should be compatibility in beliefs or religion. Moreover, dating is exclusively for adults and it should not be made as a game.

2. Do not marry a spiritually immature person

Ephesians 5:21
Submit yourselves to one another because of your reverence for Christ.

This means that a wife should submit herself to her husband in everything because the husband is the head in Divine viewpoint. The wellbeing of the family depends on the husband. A woman therefore should marry a man or choose a man in accordance to her spiritual heritage. Meaning, they should belong in the same religion or church. Spiritual intimacy is the cornerstone of marriage and the Things of God is the basic feature of marriage. The spiritual capacity of the husband should therefore be followed by the wife. So, if the husband has a strong spiritual capacity, you will be blessed as a wife and so with the whole family. In short, the Unity in Jesus Christ is the basic ingredient in marriage.

3. Do not marry in your teens.

Ecclesiastes 3:1
Everything that happens in this world happens at the time God chooses.

Ecclesiastes 3:5
The time for making love and the time for not making love, the time for kissing and the time for not kissing


Teenagers are prone to be deluded to engage in premarital sex especially with the influence of pornography in television and in other forms of mass-media. 50% end up in divorce as a result from a study for those who got married in their teens. However, those who got married in their teens regret a lot from their decisions because they missed a great portion in their youthful life.

4. Do not marry without parents approval.

Colossian 3:20
Children, it is your Christian duty, to obey your parents always, for that is what pleases God.

With the notion that parents know their children better, it is appropriate that the parents will have the final say regarding the approval whether their child will get marry or not yet. The parents duty in the said situation is to give their children appropriate guidelines because the parents have the so-called experience regarding marriage and married life.

5. Do not marry a person who is in serious conflicts with parents